Dwarf tossing contest troubled by alleged gnomes

Winner and his personnal ”dwarf” tricked other participants 

Yesterday, a local bar was the center of a controversy surrounding the winner of a dwarf tossing contest. The participants who lost the contest claim that the man who won used a friend of his who claimed to be a dwarf, but is believed to be, in fact, two gnomes in a dwarf costume.

” Why can’t they just stay in their mushroom houses for Christ’s sake! “screamed Bobby Bobinochi, professional tossed dwarf. ” Every single bloody year we find out that some Leprechaun or Brownie tried to trick us to steal our gold. This year, it’s a gnome, what will it be next, an elf!? A smurf!? Bloody damned be the faerie folk! “.

The witnesses claim that the participant and subsequently winner of the event named himself Paul Richardson and introduced his little friend as being Timothy Redbeard to the judges who couldn’t refuse Redbeard’s participation since he claimed he was a dwarf. However, it became obvious that it was but a lie when, after winning the event, a loud, surprising and repeated sneezing came out of Redbeard’s groin area. Richardson and Redbeard then ran away from the angry crowd and fled by riding on the back of a gigantic stork which flew away in the night sky.

Police are asking for witnesses to report to the nearest police station in order to complete the investigation.